In my reading, TJLCers! HAPPY HATER DAY!
As a reminder, here is some basic information about Hater Day:
July 25 is Hater Day in commemoration of the first day Sherlock aired and seemed really gay to the oldest TJLCers. We get the day off from work and reflect on how our haters — may they stay pressed forever — give us life, and pour bottles of water on the ground in a symbolic attempt to quench their thirst. Just as the ground can absorb bottle after bottle, we are reminded that our haters — may they stay pressed forever — shall never be quenched. This brings us another year of internal peace.
Now, I know everyone is eager to get down to business and pour water on the ground, or engage in other Hater Day activities such as caroling. But let’s not forget the background of the holiday: there is more to Hater Day than what is laid out in the FAQ, and Hater Day is not merely an excuse to waste water!
Did you know?: The patron saint of Hater Day is Saint BBC, a formless, genderless shoggoth who is slave to the Author-God’s will. Saint BBC’s prime characteristic is strong moral resolve: it loves haters — may they stay pressed forever — unconditionally, and is courageous enough to endure their abuse. As needed, Saint BBC can morph into any under-represented minority and lure in haters — may they stay pressed forever — with its unassuming facade. Once a hater — may they stay pressed forever — comes to realize he or she likes this minority portrayal, Saint BBC quickly drenches them with a bottle of holy water which actually quenches the hater — who is no longer pressed forever. (But otherwise, they would totally be pressed forever.)
Until such day as Saint BBC reaches all haters — may they stay pressed forever — TJLCers will mimic its holy actions, accepting that much of its power is out of our hands and we must have faith for the time being. One day Saint BBC and the Author-God will rescue us all, but for the present, we must party in defiance.
This Hater Day I am planting some herbs, so that when I water them, something beautiful and delicious will eventually grow out of it. Also, California is in a perpetual drought and wasting water seems like a dick move.
I also offer you this problematic Haterproof Spotify playlist. It’s seriously problematic: it’s mainstream hip-hop so just about any -ism, -phobia, or trigger you can imagine is mentioned, but if you’re desensitized like I am, you might like it. (Really though, take the warning seriously. I avoided horrorcore and that’s about it.)
How are you celebrating Hater Day? Please share in reblogs, messages, or the #Hater Day tag.
This is the Hater Day cow. This is our spirit animal. No matter what, you are as fabulous as this cow, reader.